♫ This love has taken its toll on me ♫ (Private, English, Kushina's room, feel free to sing along...)

"Y-you.. you too.." a soft smile. "I.. I told you, I want to.. I don't want anybody else, ever. That - kind of hasn't changed."

Another sniff, a weak grin. "Well. Two years more, then we can marry." she punched his shoulder comradely. "just gotta hang on until we can show the world, ne?"

"...yeah... Kushina.. is it.. okay to.. to love you even if.. I sort of don't like you very much right now?"

Sighing, she nodded. "I... I understand. You... Just tell me if you need a break, will you?"

"What.. a break? I just.. I don't want to break up.. not really. What do you mean?"

"Not... Not breaking up. Just. Time. Space. if you need it. We'll mind ourselves for a couple weeks, see where it goes. If it's better, afterwards."

He looked at her and frowned. "You mean. Like.. Like not be.. be together for a while?"

"... If that's what you need, yes."

"I dunno.. I felt awful these.. two weeks. And.." he looked at her painfully "- it's not fair to you. I know.. that couldn't have been easy - the way they looked at us, that doctor.."

She sighed. "No... I've never had such judgeful eyes on me before, not ever..." she bit her lip.

"Damn.." he said in a thin voice, then pulled her in close and held her, rocking her softly.

And she simply leant against him, her head on his shoulder. "... Those looks... 'twas worse than back when I was bullied." she muttered.

"Come on.. I wanna hold you," he pulled her gently backwards, toward her bed. "I guess.. the kid.. would have gotten that same deal. Huh?"

She bit her lip, nodded. "Probably. Either.. Either that, or pity. And. And that's just as bad."

He laid down carefully, pulling her down with him and holding her close, stroking her back and hair. "Probably.. I just.. there was.. It just seemed like there was a way."

"There... Really wasn't." she muttered. "It'd have been a shit situation for all three of us, no matter what."

"...well, that and you didn't even want it.. I guess.. I wasn't fair. To ever.. To not just let you decide." He didn't even know what he thought anymore. This was all so confusing..

"Well..." she sighed. "We should've talked more about it from the start, is what we should've."

"I.. guess so.. I was.. I just.. Never thought about you.. not wanting it," he confessed shamefully.

"... You were ecstatic from the start, weren't you?"

An affirmative grunt. "Mmh. I guess.. I just.. I thought that, that if we.. we'd be a family. Like - like I used to have. I'm.. that was probably very messed up, right?" He laughed, but choked on it.

"Perhaps but... Oh, 'Nato, I never thought of it that way..." she teared up again, sniffled.

"I didn't realise until now.. Which is fucked up.. I mean.. you can't be my mum, right? I won't - won't ever get her back.."

Suddenly, she hugged him close, so very tightly, sniffling into his hair. "'Nato..."

"S-sorry.. I, I'm not.. I told you I'm really messed up. I, you. Don't deserve it. Me. I should.." He wasn't crying, just felt completely dead in side.